sofia

Below is a transcribed copy of the Sofia the First episode "Baileywhoops".

Speaker Dialogue
Clover I don't get it, Sofia. All this fuss for some royal jellybeans?
Princess Sofia Not jellybeans, Clover. It's the Royal Jubilee. A big celebration of the kingdom's birthday.
Baileywick Presenting the royal family of Wei-Ling! Welcome to Enchancia.
Queen Miranda Thank you for coming.
Baileywick Presenting his majesty, King Magnus of Rudistan, and his royal sorcerer, Greylock the Grand!
King Roland II King Magnus, so good to see you.
Baileywick Ah, good morning. You must be the steward of Rudistan.
Slickwell And you must be the lucky man with the best job in all the known kingdoms, the Royal Steward of Enchancia. I am Slickwell, at your service.
Baileywick And I am Baileywick, at your service.
Princess Sofia And I'm Sofia.
Slickwell Princess Sofia, of course. What an honor. I must admit, Baileywick, I am a big admirer of your job. I mean, of you. So I brought a small token of my admiration.
Baileywick For me? Why, thank you. It is the loveliest two-headed snake I've ever seen.
Slickwell Allow me. May it bring you good luck. You're going to need it.
Baileywick "From the Kingdom of Zumaria, Queen Cecily and Princess Vivian."
Greylock the Grand Well, well. If it isn't Bedsick.
Cedric the Sorcerer You know my name, Greylock. Ow!
Greylock the Grand Sorry, Cardtrick. I just had to try out my new palm zapper! I haven't seen you since the big school reunion. I see your hair grew back okay. Oh, you've got something on your...
Cedric the Sorcerer I see you still act more like a jester than a sorcerer. Same old Greylock.
Greylock the Grand Same old Kendrick!
Cedric the Sorcerer Cedric!
Baileywick I'll take your bag, Queen Cecily. Ooh!
Princess Sofia Baileywick!
Baileywick Your Majesties!
Slickwell Oh, allow me, Your Highness.
King Roland II Thank you, uh...
Slickwell Slickwell. Slickwell, Your Majesty. And if there is ever anything more I can do for you during your stay, I would be delighted to be of service.
King Roland II Huh. That's nice of you, but Baileywick here sees to all our needs.
Baileywick I'm so sorry, Your Majesty. I don't know what came over me. Let's all go inside, shall we? We have a wonderful day planned for everyone. First, there will be a welcome luncheon, then the adults will take part in the royal croquet match, followed by the jubilee cake presentation.
Prince James Aw, we don't get cake?
King Roland II We all get cake, James. After the grown-ups take a cruise in the royal schooner.
Princess Amber So what are we doing all day?
Queen Miranda Greylock the Grand has kindly volunteered to entertain you with his feats of magic.
Princess Sofia, Princess Amber, and Prince James Ooh!
King Magnus Prepare to be astounded by the greatest sorcerer who ever waved a wand.
Cedric the Sorcerer I am just as great as you.
Greylock the Grand But nowhere near as fun.
Cedric the Sorcerer We'll just see about that. Your Majesties, I should also like to volunteer to entertain the children.
King Roland II That's a first.
Cedric the Sorcerer I'll show you who's more fun.
Greylock the Grand May the best sorcerer win.
Cedric the Sorcerer Ahhh!
Greylock the Grand Greylock, one. Redbrick, nothing.
Slickwell Oh, it seems they forgot the jiggly-wiggly pudding.
Baileywick Oh, dear, I'll take it. Thank you, Slickwell.
King Magnus And if you recall, my royal jubilee lasted an entire month!
King Roland II It certainly seemed like it.
Baileywick Pudding, Your Majesty... Whoa!
King Roland II Whoa!
Prince James Whoa!
Queen Miranda Oh, my!
Baileywick. Your Majesty. I, I'm so sorry. Let me clean it...
Princess Sofia Baileywick!
Slickwell Allow me, Your Highness. I always keep this special stain remover on hand, in case of accidents just like this.
Baileywick Are you okay, Your Majesty?
King Roland II My coat is as good as new. Thanks to Slickwell.
Baileywick If you'll excuse me, Your Majesties.
Princess Sofia Baileywick, are you all right?
Baileywick Apparently not. I don't know what's wrong with me.
Princess Sofia It was only an accident.
Baileywick Two accidents. Make that three.
Slickwell Oh, another mess?
Baileywick I'm afraid so.
Slickwell Allow me. It pains me to say it, but I've seen this sort of thing before.
Baileywick You have?
Slickwell Indeed. Even the greatest stewards eventually grow too old for the job.
Baileywick Too old?
Princess Sofia Baileywick's not too old. Everyone gets a little clumsy sometimes.
Baileywick Well, at least this one didn't break. Whoa!
Slickwell We all have to retire one day. Perhaps that day is sooner than you think.
Princess Sofia You're not really thinking about quitting, are you, Baileywick?
Baileywick I have been doing this job a long time.
Princess Sofia You can't leave.
Baileywick And I don't intend to. But what if my clumsiness keeps up? I could ruin the whole jubilee.
Princess Sofia No, you won't. Because I'm going to help you.
Baileywick Oh, you don't have to do that, Princess.
Princess Sofia Yes, I do. You've always been there for me. Now I'm going to be here for you.

♪ Today I'll lend a hand to you
Wherever you go, whatever you do ♪

Slickwell

♪ I have a plan to trip you up
Drop every tray and every cup ♪

Princess Sofia

♪ So if you hesitate or doubt
Just look to me I'll help you out ♪

Slickwell

♪ Because that serpent pin is cursed
You'll go from being best to worst! ♪

Princess Sofia

♪ I'll be your helping hand
when the need arises ♪

Slickwell

♪ And I will help provide
Some terrible and cruel surprises ♪

Princess Sofia

♪ I'll stand right by your side
To help you stay in line ♪

Slickwell

♪ And I will never rest
Until your job is mine!
Mine!
Being Steward of Enchancia, that's my dream
To get that job I've hatched a truly amazing scheme
It involves a secret trick... Ha-ha!
Getting rid of Baileywick! ♪

Princess Sofia

♪ To help you out, I'll look the part
I'll put on a coat and dress up smart ♪

Slickwell

♪ And if you worry, fret, or frown
Slickwell kicks you when your down ♪

Princess Sofia

♪ There's no need to lose your nerve
Your junior steward's here to serve ♪

Slickwell

♪ But now that you're a clumsy clod
Slickwell's going to steal your job! ♪

Princess Sofia

♪ I'll be your helping hand
when the need arises ♪

Slickwell

♪ And I will help provide
Some terrible and cruel surprises ♪

Princess Sofia

♪ I'll stand right by your side
To help you stay in line ♪

Slickwell

♪ And I will never rest
Until your job is mine! ♪

All mine!

Princess Sofia ♪ I'll guide you throughout the day ♪
Slickwell ♪ I'll push you out of the way until your job is mine ♪
Princess Sofia ♪ Faithful friend of mine ♪
Slickwell ♪ Your job will soon be mine ♪
Princess Sofia ♪ I know you'll do just fine ♪
Slickwell ♪ That job will soon be mine ♪
Princess Sofia I am ready to serve.
Baileywick Nice outfit. But it's missing one thing. Your very own pocket watch.
Princess Sofia Ooh! Thanks, Baileywick. We better get going. We have a jubilee to host.
Baileywick After you, Princess. Oh, dear.
Cedric the Sorcerer Now, children, behold this normal sheet of paper. Swano foldano!
Prince James Hmm, pretty nice.
Princess Amber Yes. But does it do anything?
Cedric the Sorcerer Uh... I suppose it might float, if you put it in water.
Greylock the Grand Balloonium inflato! Who wants an enchanted balloon animal?
Princess Vivian I do!
Prince James Me too, please!
Greylock the Grand Hey, Hattrick! Would you like one, too?
Cedric the Sorcerer Piñatapalooza! Oh, children! Who wants to take the first swing?
Prince James I do! I do!
Prince Jin No, me!
Baileywick Your Majesties, it is time for the royal croquet match!
Slickwell Here you are, Your Highness.
King Magnus Good man, Slickwell.
Slickwell Masterful shot, Your Majesty.
King Magnus You chose the perfect mallet for me, Slickwell. As always.
Slickwell Thank you, Your Highness.
King Roland II Baileywick, would you choose a mallet for me?
Baileywick Right away, sire. Whoa!
Princess Sofia Nice toss, Baileywick! Here you go, Dad!
King Roland II Thanks, Sofia.
Slickwell Hmm, I'll have to do something about her.
Princess Sofia Nice shot.
King Roland II Baileywick, I think I need a heavier mallet for this one.
Princess Sofia I'll get it.
Slickwell Uh-pah-pah-pah. Oh, dear. You seem to have stepped in some mud, Princess. I'll just clean off your shoes for you.
Princess Sofia That's okay, Slickwell. You don't have to.
Slickwell But I insist.
King Roland II Baileywick.
Baileywick Yes, right away, Your Majesty. Your mallet, sire. Ah!
King Roland II Ow! Ow, ow, ow!
Slickwell Oh, allow me, sire.
Baileywick Oh, Your Majesty. I'm so, so sorry.
King Roland II Are you sure you're feeling all right, Baileywick?
Baileywick I don't know, Your Majesty. If... If you'll excuse me.
Princess Sofia Baileywick!
Baileywick Perhaps Slickwell is right. Perhaps it is time I retire.
Princess Sofia No!
Slickwell Yes! I mean, there comes a point in every steward's life when it's finally time to hang up the watch and call it quits, as hard as that may be.
Princess Sofia You can't do that. We need you.
Slickwell Oh, I'm sure King Roland could find an able replacement.
Princess Sofia Baileywick, when I first became a princess, I wasn't sure I could do it. Someone told me that I should keep trying and things would get easier. That someone was you.
Baileywick Okay, Princess Sofia. I'll give it one more try.
Prince James This one looks good.
Cedric the Sorcerer Oh, it's a bang pop. Be careful.
Prince James Why? Brilliant!
Greylock the Grand Oh, children! Forces of magic far and near, make a carousel appear!
Princess Amber Oh, look at all the unicorns!
Prince James Let's try it out!
Princess Jun Come on!
Greylock the Grand Not too shabby, eh?
Cedric the Sorcerer Hmph. Show-off.
Princess Amber Oh, they're all so pretty! And unicorn-y!
Prince James I call the green one.
Prince Jin I want the yellow one.
Greylock the Grand Revolvo! Now remember to tell your royal parents who conjured up this fun ride for you. Greylock the Grand!
Cedric the Sorcerer You don't think I'm going to let you get all the glory, do you? Wingaroodle-doo!
Prince James Whoa!
Princess Amber Wings? Oh, I did not think this could get any better!
Greylock the Grand Oh, yeah? Well, watch this! Speediupitus!
Cedric the Sorcerer Flapezio!
Greylock the Grand Liftoffigus!
Princess Jun Whoa!
Prince Jin We're flying!
Prince James Whoa!
Greylock the Grand Ha! Top that!
Princess Amber A flying unicorn carousel! It's my dream come true!
Cedric the Sorcerer Oh, is it going to come back down?
Greylock the Grand I... I don't know.
Princess Sofia What a beautiful cake.
Slickwell Yes, but keeping all that powdered sugar from falling off will require a steady hand. I am happy to carry it out, if you like.
Baileywick Thank you. But it's a royal tradition for the steward to bring out the cake.
Slickwell And what a great tradition that is. After you...
Princess Sofia Careful, Baileywick. I'll get the door.
King Roland II And now it's time to open the jubilee gifts. This one is from the kingdom of Wei-Ling. What a marvelous vase! So beautiful and delicate. We will treasure it always. Thank you.
King Magnus Oh! That one's from me. It's a gift fit for a king!
King Roland II Why, this is even better than last year's statue of you.
Baileywick Your Majesties, may I present the Royal Jubilee birthday cake of Enchancia!
Slickwell This ought to be good!
Baileywick Ah! Ah... ah... ah... achoo!
Princess Sofia Dad!
Slickwell Allow me, Your Majesty.
Baileywick Well, I suppose there's only one thing left to do. Your Majesty, I'm afraid I can no longer serve as castle steward of Enchancia. I humbly offer my resignation.
Princess Sofia No!
King Roland II Well, I don't accept it. I won't accept it. You've just been working too hard. All you need is a little rest.
Queen Miranda A vacation, perhaps.
Baileywick I wish it were that simple. But I've embarrassed you and destroyed your royal gifts. I'm afraid it is time for me to retire.
Princess Sofia You can't quit, Baileywick. Don't let him quit, Dad.
King Roland II I'm sure whatever's wrong will pass. And you can't leave us right in the middle of the jubilee.
Baileywick But that's why I'm leaving. So I don't ruin the rest of it.
Slickwell Um, f it helps. I would be happy to fill in for the rest of the jubilee, if it's all right with my king.
King Magnus Why, I think it's a fantastic idea. Then King Roland can see what great service is all about.
Princess Sofia But, Baileywick, you can't just leave us. We need you.
Queen Miranda You're a part of the family.
King Roland II Please stay, old friend.
Baileywick Thank you, all of you. But I think this is for the best. Farewell.
Cedric the Sorcerer Oh! We have to get them back down!
Greylock the Grand Haltimbanco! I can't hold it!
Cedric the Sorcerer I'll help you. Objectus descendo! Oh! That was a close call.
Greylock the Grand Is everyone all right?
Cedric the Sorcerer And willing to be sworn to secrecy about what just happened?
Prince James That was brilliant!
Princess Jun Best ride ever!
Princess Amber Can we do it again?
Cedric the Sorcerer Um... I don't see why not.
Princess Sofia Wait! I can do more. I'll carry things for you. And... And serve the meals. Whatever it takes. Just don't leave.
Baileywick You are very kind, Princess Sofia. But it's time for me to go.
Princess Sofia No, it's not. You're the best steward in the world. People admire you so much, they even give you gifts.
Baileywick And I am going to give this gift to someone I admire.
Princess Sofia But...
Baileywick Now I really must start packing.
Clover Hey, Sofia, you okay?
Princess Sofia Whoa!
Clover Hey, watch out, watch out, watch out!
Princess Sofia Sorry about that.
Clover Whew. Oh. Hey, you dropped this... Oh! What's going on? It's like I got a case of the clumsies or something. Can't even hold onto a little pin.
Princess Sofia The pin. When I had it, I slipped. When you had it, you stumbled. And Baileywick didn't get clumsy until Slickwell gave him this pin.
Clover You think the pin made Baileywick clumsy?
Princess Sofia I don't know. But we need to talk to Slickwell. Let's go! Oof!
Clover Okay. But let's go slowly.
Slickwell Come on now, pick up the pace. It's time for the harbor cruise. There is no slacking off when Slickwell's in charge! You forgot... Ugh! If you want anything done right, you have to do it yourself.
Princess Sofia Oh! Oh, this pin is awful!
Clover Hey, Sofia. Look!
Princess Sofia It's the same as this pin. The Beginner's Guide to Magically Cursed Objects. Whoa. "Whoever wears the Pin of Klutzenheimer shall be cursed with colossal clumsiness!"
Clover Whoa! Ya think?
Princess Sofia Slickwell gave Baileywick a pin that would make him clumsy! And then he kept telling him to retire so he could steal Baileywick's job! We've got to stop him.
Clover Okay. You go find Baileywick. I'll make sure Slickwell doesn't get away with it.
Princess Sofia Thanks, Clover.
Clover Oh, I hate this thing.
Slickwell All aboard for the harbor cruise!
King Roland II Thank you, Slickwell.
Clover It's time you had a taste of your own medicine.
Slickwell If it pleases Your Majesty, I would gladly stay on as your royal steward permanently... Ooh!
Clover High-five me.
Princess Sofia Baileywick, wait! Baileywick!
King Roland II The cruise just won't be the same without Baileywick.
Queen Miranda Nothing will be.
King Roland II Attention, everyone. I would like to propose a toast. Slickwell, please pour the gooseberry cider.
Slickwell Right away, Your Majesty. Just a moment, sire. My apologies. Oh! Sorry again. Slippery deck. Now, let me take care of this stubborn cork. I beg your pardon. Oh! The cider! No, I'll stop it! Gangway!
King Roland II The wheel!
Queen Miranda Roland, the rocks!
King Roland II Captain Vasquez, can you turn the ship?
Captain Vasquez Not without the wheel.
Baileywick So all this time, it was a cursed magic pin making me clumsy?
Princess Sofia Oh, no! They've already left!
Baileywick Sofia, look. The boat is headed right for the rocks.
Princess Sofia Why aren't they turning away?
Baileywick They must be in trouble. We have to help them.
Princess Sofia How?
Baileywick I have an idea. Greylock, the royal schooner is in trouble. Can you stop it?
Cedric the Sorcerer We'll do it together.
Greylock the Grand Like the carousel.
Cedric the Sorcerer To the dock!
Captain Vasquez It's no use. We must abandon ship, Your Majesties.
King Magnus But... But I can't swim.
Cedric the Sorcerer Together now, Greylock!
Cedric the Sorcerer and Greylock the Grand Lifoffigus!
Cedric the Sorcerer And let's bring it back.
Cedric the Sorcerer and Greylock the Grand Returno Homeo!
King Roland II Well done!
Queen Cecily What a relief.
Baileywick Is everyone all right?
Queen Miranda We're fine.
King Roland II Thank you for saving us, Greylock.
Greylock the Grand I couldn't have done it without my friend Cedric.
King Roland II Oh? Well done, Cedric.
Cedric the Sorcerer Thank you, Your Majesty.
King Roland II I'm sorry about the cruise, everyone. And the mess.
Slickwell Here, allow me to clean it up...
Princess Sofia No, allow me to tell everyone what you did. Slickwell gave Baileywick a cursed magic pin that made him super-clumsy.
Slickwell The pin!
Princess Sofia And there it is, right there.
Slickwell Uh, Your Majesties, I can explain.
King Roland II I think we've seen all we need to see. Slickwell, your services are no longer needed.
Slickwell You can't fire me. I work for King Magnus!
King Magnus Not anymore, you don't, Slickwell.
Slickwell What? But, sire! Please! Whoa! Oh, blasted pin!
Queen Miranda Baileywick, I am so glad you're still here.
King Roland II I hope this means you'll change your mind about leaving.
Baileywick Leaving? How can I leave when there's so much work to be done? Please fetch the spare glasses from the crystal cabinet. And there's another jug of gooseberry cider in the galley.
Servants Yes, sir. Right away.
Baileywick Princess Sofia, if it wasn't for you, I don't know what I would have done. Thank you for being such a loyal friend.
Princess Sofia I'm just glad you're staying.
Baileywick Me, too.
Slickwell You haven't heard the last of Slickwell! Oh! Ah! Curse that pin.
King Roland II Attention, everyone. I'd like to propose a toast to the best castle steward a king could ever have, and a great friend. To Baileywick!
All To Baileywick!
Transcripts
Season 1
"Just One of the Princes" | "The Big Sleepover" | "Let the Good Times Troll" | "Cedric's Apprentice" | "A Royal Mess" | "The Shy Princess" | "Blue Ribbon Bunny" | "The Princess Test" | "Baileywick's Day Off" | "Tri-Kingdom Picnic" | "The Little Witch" | "Two to Tangu" | "Finding Clover" | "The Amulet of Avalor" | "The Buttercups" | "Make Way for Miss Nettle" | "The Amulet and the Anthem" | "Tea for Too Many" | "Princess Butterfly" | "Great Aunt-Venture" | "The Baker King" | "Holiday in Enchancia" | "Four's a Crowd"
Season 2
"Two Princesses and a Baby" | "The Enchanted Feast" | "The Flying Crown" | "Mom's the Word" | "The Silent Knight" | "Enchanted Science Fair" | "King for a Day" | "When You Wish Upon a Well" | "Gizmo Gwen" | "Sofia the Second" | "Mystic Meadows" | "Princesses to the Rescue!" | "Ghostly Gala" | "The Emerald Key" | "Scrambled Pets" | "The Princess Stays in the Picture" | "Baileywhoops" | "Winter's Gift" | "The Leafsong Festival" | "Substitute Cedric" | "Clover Time" | "In a Tizzy" | "A Tale of Two Teams" | "The Littlest Princess" | "Buttercup Amber" | "Carol of the Arrow" | "Sidekick Clio"
Season 3
"Cool Hand Fluke" | "Minimus is Missing" | "Cedric Be Good" | "Princess Adventure Club" | "Minding the Manor" | "The Secret Library" | "New Genie on the Block" | "The Fliegel Has Landed" | "The Princess Ballet" | "All the Sprite Moves" | "Sofia in Elvenmoor" | "Stormy Lani" | "Lord of the Rink" | "The Secret Library: Olaf and the Tale of Miss Nettle" | "Gone with the Wand" | "Bad Little Dragon" | "Bunny Swap" | "Her Royal Spyness" | "Best in Air Show" | "Dads and Daughters Day" | "The Secret Library: The Tale of the Noble Knight" | "The Bamboo Kite" | "Beauty is the Beast" | "Cauldronation Day" | "Camp Wilderwood" | "Royal Vacation" | "Hexley Hall" | "The Princess Prodigy" | "One for the Books"
Season 4
"Day of the Sorcerers" | "The Secret Library: Tale of the Eternal Torch" | "The Crown of Blossoms" | "Pin the Blame on the Genie" | "The Mystic Isles: The Princess and the Protector" | "The Royal Dragon" | "The Mystic Isles: The Mare of the Mist" | "Through the Looking Back Glass" | "Princess Jade" | "Ivy's True Colors" | "Too Cute to Spook" | "Pirated Away" | "The Mystic Isles: The Falcon's Eye" | "The Mystic Isles: The Great Pretender" | "The Mystic Isles: A Very Mystic Wassalia" | "The Birthday Wish" | "In Cedric We Trust" | "The Mystic Isles: A Hero for the Hoodwinks" | "The Mystic Isles: Undercover Fairies" | "A Royal Wedding" | "The Royal School Fair" | "The Lost Pyramid" | "Return to Merroway Cove" | "The Elf Situation"
Television films
Sofia the First: Once Upon a Princess | Sofia the First: The Floating Palace | Sofia the First: The Curse of Princess Ivy | Elena and the Secret of Avalor | Sofia the First: The Mystic Isles | Sofia the First: Forever Royal